Quotes by Professor Farnsworth
Good news, everyone! I've taught the toaster to feel love!
Amy: [in Farnsworth's body] Oh no! Can we switch back using four or more bodies?
Professor Farnsworth: [in Bender's body] I'm not sure. I'm afraid we need to use... MATH.
I hate these nerds. Just because I'm stupider than them they think they're smarter than me.
Fry: Fetal stem cells? Aren't those controversial?
Professor: In your time, yes, but nowadays—shut up! Besides, these are adult stem cells, harvested from perfectly healthy adults whom I killed for their stem cells.
Professor: Nothing is impossible! Not if you believe in it. That's what being a scientist is all about!
Cubert: No, that's what being a magical elf is all about!
And so we say goodbye to our beloved pet, Nibbler, who's gone to a place where I, too, hope one day to go. The toilet.
Professor Farnsworth: For example, if you killed your grandfather, you'd cease to exist!
Fry: But existing is basically all I do!
Oh, I don't have time for this. I have to go and buy a single piece of fruit with a coupon and then return it, making people wait behind me while I complain.
Oh, I always feared he might run off like this. Why, why, why didn't I break his legs?
It worked! Eat it, everyone who's never won a Nobel's Prize! And that includes you, Amy!
[after being attacked by the video game character Donkey Kong]
Fry: Wait a second. I know that monkey! His name is Donkey.
Professor Farnsworth: Monkeys aren't donkeys. Quit messing with my head!
Announcer: And the winner is number three, in a quantum finish.
Prof. Farnsworth: No fair! You changed the outcome by measuring it!
Fry: I'm impressed. In my time we had no idea Mars had a university.
Professor Farnsworth: That's because then Mars was a uninhabitable wasteland, much like Utah. But unlike Utah, Mars was eventually made livable when the university was founded in 2636.
Professor Farnsworth: But what about your super intelligence?
Gunther: When I had that, it was too much pressure to use it. All I want out of life is to be a monkey of moderate intelligence who wears a suit. Thats why I've decided to transfer to business school.
Professor Farnsworth: Noooooooo!
Showing 14 quotes.