Captain James S. Hook


Quoted in: Hook

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Quotes by Captain James S. Hook: Hook

Pirate: He's stealing second!
[the catcher shoots the base stealer with his pistol and the crowd cheers]
Captain Hook: No, no, no! Now stop it! We're playing this game by Master Jack's rules. Bad form! Sit down, now. Let's resume the game. A very violent sport, isn't it, baseball?

Captain Hook: No, child, Your mother wants to read to you every night in order to stupefy to sleep, so that she and daddy could sit down for three measly minutes without you. And you mindless, inexhaustible, unstoppable, repetitive, and nagging demands: He took my toy! She hit my bear! I want a potty! I want a cookie! I want to stay up! I want, I want, I want, me, me, me, me, mine, mine, mine, mine, now, now, now, now! Can't you understand, child? They tell you stories to shut you up.
Smee: And conk you out.
Maggie: That's not true, Jack! [to Hook] You're a liar!
Captain Hook: Lie? Me? Never. The truth is far too much fun.

Captain Hook: You, the cute little urchin in the front row, won't you share your thoughts with the whole class?
Maggie: Yes! I said mommy reads to us every night, because she loves us very much!
Captain Hook: Loves you? Isn't that the, uh, the...
Smee: The 'L' word, Captain.

Captain Hook: Peter! Where are you going? Come back here and fight me! Or I'll find you wherever you are, you hear me? Bad form, Peter, come back!
Maggie: You need a mother very, very badly!

Smee: I've just had an apostrophe.
Captain Hook: I think you mean an epiphany.
Smee: Lightning has just struck my brain.
Captain Hook: Well, that must hurt.

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