Quotes by Comic Book Guy: The Simpsons
Comic Book Guy: That is a rare photo of Sean Connery signed by Roger Moore; it is worth one hundred and fifty dollars.
Milhouse: What can I get for seventy-five cents?
Comic Book Guy: Ugh, you may purchase this charming Hamburglar adventure, a child has already solved the jumble using crayons. The answer is 'fries'.
Bart: Cool! I'll give you ten bucks for that.
Comic Book Guy: Are you the creator of Hi and Lois, because you are making me laugh. That drawing is worth exactly seven hundred and fifty dollars American.
Marge: Hmmm. Should the Simpsons get a horse?
Comic Book Guy: Excuse me, I believe this family already had a horse, and the expense forced Homer to work at the Kwik-E-Mart, with hilarious consequences.
Homer: Anybody care what this guy thinks?
[as The Collector] Stop right there! I have here the only working phaser ever built; it was fired only once...to keep William Shatner from making another album!
Oooh, loneliness and cheeseburgers are a dangerous mix.
Comic Book Guy: Last night's Itchy & Scratchy was, without a doubt, the worst episode ever. Rest assured, I was on the Internet within minutes, registering my disgust throughout the world.
Bart: Hey, I know it wasn't great, but what right do you have to complain?
Comic Book Guy: As a loyal viewer, I feel they owe me.
Bart: What? They've given you thousands of hours of entertainment for free! What could they possibly owe you? If anything, you owe them!
Comic Book Guy: Worst episode ever.
Showing 6 quotes.