Waylon Smithers


Quoted in: The Simpsons

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Quotes by Waylon Smithers: The Simpsons

What's wrong with this country!? Can't a man walk down the street without being offered a job?

Mr. Burns: No, Smithers, I've decided to bring in a few ringers. Professional baseballers. We'll give them token jobs at the plant and have them play on our softball team. Honus Wagner, Cap Anson, Mordecai "Three Finger" Brown...
Smithers: Sir?
Mr. Burns: What is it, Smithers?
Smithers: I'm afraid all those players have retired and... passed on. In fact, your right fielder has been dead for 130 years.

Smithers: Each two-man team will work its way through the wilderness to a cabin hidden somewhere on this mountain. The routes are treacherous, so use your maps.
Homer: [raising his hand] Uh, I lost my map.
Smithers: You haven't been issued a map, yet.

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