Galaxy Quest

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Released on Dec. 23, 1999

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The stars of a 1970s sci-fi show - now scraping a living through re-runs and sci-fi conventions - are beamed aboard an alien spacecraft. Believing the cast's heroic on-screen dramas are historical documents of real-life adventures, the band of aliens turn to the ailing celebrities for help in their quest to overcome the oppressive regime in their solar system.


Quotes from Galaxy Quest

Gwen DeMarco: Does the rolling *help*?
Jason Nesmith: Yes, it helps.


[after going through the chompers] Whoever wrote this episode should die!


Jason Nesmith: Hi! What's up with her, doesn't she talk?
Quellek: Her translator is broken.
Laliari: Yalalalala!
Jason Nesmith: Okey dokey.


Hey guys, I just wanted you to know that, the reactors won't take it; the ship is breaking apart and all that... Just FYI.


Guy Fleegman: I don't like this. I don't like this at all.
Gwen DeMarco: They are *so* cute.
Guy Fleegman: Sure, they're cute now, but in a second they're gonna get mean, and they're gonna get ugly somehow, and there's gonna be a million more of them.


[Fred tries to digitize the pig-lizard with disastrous results]
Jason: What? What was that?
Alexander: Uh, nothing.
Jason: I heard some squealing or something.
Gwen: Oh, no. Everything's fine.
Teb: But the animal is inside out.
Jason: I heard that! It turned inside out?
[the pig-lizard explodes]
Teb: And it exploded.
Jason: Did I just hear that the animal turned inside out, and then it EXPLODED? Hello?
Gwen: [Flipping a bit of pig-lizard off her communicator] Hold, please.


Jason: You're not gonna die on the planet, Guy.
Guy: I'm not? Then what's my last name?
Jason: It's... uh... uh... I don't know.
Guy: Nobody knows. Do you know why? Because my character isn't important enough for a last name, because I'm gonna die five minutes in!
Gwen: Guy, you have a last name.
Guy: DO I? DO I? For all you know, I'm Crewman Number Six! Mommy... mommy..


Gwen: [Gwen and Jason encounter the chompers] What is this thing? I mean, it serves no useful purpose for there to be a bunch of chompy, crushy things in the middle of a hallway. No, I mean we shouldn't have to do this, it makes no logical sense, why is it here?
Jason: 'Cause it's on the television show.
Gwen: Well forget it! I'm not doing it! This episode was badly written!


I'm going to rest my eyes for a moment. But go on. I am listening...


Fred: Hey, Commander. Listen, we found some beryllium on a nearby planet. And we might be able to get there if we reconfigure the solar matrix in parallel for endothermic propulsion. What'd'ya think?
Jason: We'll do that!
Guy: All right!
Fred: That's right again. That's... come on, group hug.


Hey guys, I just wanted you to know that, the reactors won't take it; the ship is breaking apart and all that... Just FYI.


Guy: I'm just a glorified extra, Fred. I'm a dead man anyway. If I'm gonna die, I'd rather go out a hero than a coward.
Fred: Guy, Guy, maybe you're the plucky comic relief. You ever think about that?
Guy: Plucky?


That was a hell of a thing.


HEY! Don't open that! It's an alien planet! Is there air? You don't know!


Alexander: You're just going to have to kill it.
Jason: Kill it? Well, I'm open to any suggestions.
Tommy: Go for the eyes, like in episode 22!
Jason: He doesn't have any eyes, Tommy!
Tommy: Go for the mouth, then, the throat, his vulnerable spots!
Jason: It's a rock! It doesn't have any vulnerable spots!
Guy: I know! You construct a weapon. Look around, can you form some sort of rudimentary lathe?


I see you've managed to get your shirt off.


Alexander: You're just going to have to figure out what it wants. What is its motivation?
Jason: It's a rock monster. It doesn't have motivation.
Alexander: See, that's your problem, Jason. You were never serious about the craft.


Alexander: Could they be the miners?
Fred: Sure, they're like three years old.
Alexander: MINERS, not MINORS.
Fred: You lost me.


Let's get out of here before one of those things kills Guy.


Did you guys ever WATCH the show?


Voice of Computer: Negative, there is no replacement Beryllium Sphere on board.
Gwen: No, there is no replacement Beryllium Sphere on board.
Tommy: You know, that is really getting annoying!
Gwen: Look! I have one job on this lousy ship, it's *stupid*, but I'm gonna do it! Okay?
Tommy: Sure, no problem.


Never give up. Never surrender.


By Grabthar's hammer, by the suns of Worvan, you shall be avenged.


Brandon: I just wanted to tell you that I thought a lot about what you said.
Jason: It's okay, now listen...
Brandon: But I want you to know that I'm not a complete brain case, okay? I understand completely that it's just a TV show. I know there's no beryllium sphere...
Jason: Hold it.
Brandon: No digital conveyor, no ship...
Jason: Stop for a second, stop. It's all real.
Brandon: Oh my God, I knew it. I knew it! I knew it!


Gwen: They're not ALL "historical documents." Surely, you don't think Gilligan's Island is a...
Mathesar: Those poor people.

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