The Simpsons Season 8 Episode 25: The Secret War of Lisa Simpson

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First aired on May 18, 1997

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When Bart is sent to military school after playing a prank on the town, Lisa decides to join him... as the school's only girl cadet.


Okay, I'm not going to give up. Solitude never hurt anyone. Emily Dickinson lived alone, and she wrote some of the most beautiful poetry the world has ever known... then went crazy as a loon.

Marge: Now about your punishment, young man.
Bart: I know, I'll go to my room and think about what I did.
Homer: Oh, no, your room is full of toys. You're going to the, uh, garage.
Bart: You're the boss.

Lisa: It's not my nature to complain, but so far today we've had three movies, two filmstrips, and an hour and a half of magazine time. I just don't feel challenged.
Principal Skinner: Of course we could make things more challenging, Lisa, but then the stupider students would be in here complaining, furrowing their brows in a vain attempt to understand the situation.

By 1964, experts say man will have established twelve colonies on the moon, ideal for family vacations. Once there, you'll weigh only a small percentage of what you weigh on Earth. Slow down, tubby! You're not on the moon yet!

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