Recently Added Quotes
Rev. Lovejoy: No Homer, God didn't burn your house down, but he was working in the hearts of your friends be they Christian, Jew, or ... miscellaneous.
Apu: Hindu. There are seven hundred million of us.
Rev. Lovejoy: Aww, that's super.
Reverend Lovejoy: Homer, I'd like you to remember Matthew 7:26. "The foolish man who built his house upon the sand."
Homer: And you remember ... Matthew... 21:17.
Reverend Lovejoy: "And he left them and went out of the city, into Bethany, and he lodged there?"
Homer: Yeah. Think about it.
She's like a Milk Dud, Lis: sweet on the outside, poison on the inside.
Lisa: Don't be so hard on yourself, Bart. It's not your fault Jessica doesn't like you.
Bart: Is it my hair? My overbite? The fact that I've worn the same clothes day in, day out for the last four years?
Lisa: No, Bart. I just think you and Jessica are too different from each other to get along. She's a sweet, kind reverend's daughter and you're the devil's cabana boy
Rev. Lovejoy: Don't you ever come near my daughter again! Never have I heard such gratuitous use of the word "butt"!
Bart: But -- but -- but --
Fry: Wow, so this is a real TV station, huh.
TV Worker: Well, it's a Fox affiliate.
Fry: What are you showing right now?
TV Worker: 'Single Female Lawyer.' It's the season finale. Wanna watch?
Fry: I dunno. That's a chick show. I prefer programs of the genre 'World's Blankiest Blank'.
TV Worker: She is wearing the world's shortiest skirt.
Fry: I'm in.
Krusty's Accountant: Let me get this straight: you took all the money you made in franchising your name, and bet it against the Harlem Globetrotters?
Krusty: I thought the Generals were due!
I've said it before and I'll say it again: democracy simply doesn't work.
And, like Icarus, the rocket foolishly soared too high, and lost control of its servo guidance mechanism, leaving us with some... six hours to live.
Uh, Lisa, the whole reason we have elected officials is so we don't have to think all the time. Just like that rainforest scare a few years back. Our officials saw there was a problem and they fixed it, didn't they?
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