Recently Added Quotes
Todd: Well, something had to come through the window! Something had to break the stereo!
Margo: And why is the carpet all wet, *Todd*?
Todd: I don't *know*, Margo!
I don't know what to say, except it's Christmas and we're all in misery.
Clark: Can I refill your eggnog for you? Get you something to eat? Drive you out to the middle of nowhere and leave you for dead?
Eddie: Naw, I'm doing just fine, Clark.
Clark: Burn some dust here. Eat my rubber.
Rusty: Dad, I think you mean burn rubber and eat my dust.
Clark: Whatever, Russ. Whatever.
Ellen: Clark, I think it'd be best if everyone went home... before things get worse.
Clark: WORSE? How could things get any worse? Take a look around here, Ellen. We're at the threshold of hell.
Eddie: You surprised to see us, Clark?
Clark: Oh, Eddie... If I woke up tomorrow with my head sewn to the carpet, I wouldn't be more surprised than I am now.
They say a man who represents himself has a fool for a client. Well, with God as my witness, I am that fool!
Don't torture yourself, Gomez. That's my job.
Morticia: When we first met years ago, it was an evening much like this. Magic in the air. A boy.
Gomez: A girl.
Morticia: An open grave. It was my first funeral.
Gomez: You were so beautiful. Pale and mysterious. No one even looked at the corpse.
I would die for her. I would kill for her. Either way, what bliss.
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